can't decide if i want to get drunk or coked for this harry potter thing.. it is kind of long
aren't you going with children?
do you think there was ever a doctor who smelled his finger after giving a prostate exam?
Halloween 2010: the NuvaRing girls. You're Thursday. We'll walk into the party chanting "Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday, Friday, Saturday, Sunday, Everydaaay".
The mexican place next the the funeral home has dollar margaritas, our grandfather would want us to act on this... trust me i know.
I don't remember which guy I met at the bar is coming to pick me up. It will be like my birthday surprise.
The bartender gave me a roll of masking tape so I could tape my heels to my feet so I wouldn't lose them when i went drunk running later that night
Amazing. Super drunk. We stole a street sign in a golf cart and went around jousting trash cans all night.
I shouldn't trust a guy I just met with the pull out method. That's a big responsibility.
I may have to steal the boat sober, but I feel that would be harder to explain.
Sadly he is straight as an arrow that is designed by a robot computer from the future with lasers.
This saddens me. Mostly because I want to see the schematics on that robot.
Tequila Tuesday.. tonight is the night I defeat the liquor.
I have class at 8:30 and I am not bailing you out of the drunk tank again.
I can't hang out tomorrow. A boy wants to feed me ice cream and touch my boobs. Priorities.
HE MIGHT HAVE YOUR BUTTHOLE, BUT HE CANT HAVE YOUR HEART. THATS MINE.
I wrote him a note at the end of the final. I'm hoping I can flirt my way in to an A or B
Certain restrictions may apply. Common side effects of sex with me include unbridled joy, a healthy glow, soreness and the inability to walk for short to long amounts of time. If any of these side effects occur please consult your physician, so he/she can prescribe me a "high-five".
Randomize