I just saw a hot homeless man
i thought i was pinching her nipple. It was her mole
I just realized I used lady gaga lyrics in my research paper on marie antoinette
I'm just concerned it's gonna end up in my vagina again
Sex tent. say it aloud its amazing. promise you we rnt stoned.
I mean Grimace is basically just a big piece of purple shit and he is loved way more than the hamburglar just to put it into perspective
He gave up on mugging us when Dave wouldn't stop laughing. He was wiggling his finger at the knife and making baby noises and giggling. The guy just walked away.
What part of I'm done do you not understand? Im not going to send you sex photos to prove I've moved on..
Believe me. As soon as the boss man is out the door. I am on my way to wow your vagina with my horse-like attributes.
am i new drunk or am i still drunk
Reason # 294827284949272 i could never be a cop. I would just shoot. All the time. Ppl. Animals. Inanimate objects. Air.
My doctor said I can only have one drink at a time, ever, from now on. My life has officially started its decline.
We've been watching Scooby Doo and having sex for the past 36 hours, so life is great
We got kicked out of yet another strip club because your mom wanted to "show these kiddies how it's done"
Bruh why you gotta judge
You're awake at 3:30 in the morning RSVPing to a musical, I'm well within my means
Randomize
