I just need someone to hold me and tell me i dont turn boys gay
How would you go about getting a hold of the country star that you slept with and are now potentially pregnant with their baby...?
myspace Music?
my coke dealer is running a Black Friday special
I'm pretty sure God is rooting for me with this two gf thing
I am getting my wife a tattoo just above her butthole that says, "For entry just add tequila."
We found her. She's owling on the sink in the bathroom.
My last google search of the night was "Things that cost $102.50"
drinking from the bathtub cause I'm too lazy to walk downstairs and too thirsty to care
Would jacking off with Benadryl cream be good or bad for the poison oak on my dick?
I traded him cumming in my face for a year for a Disney annual pass. One giant leap back for feminism, one small step for the adult child Disney fan.
The guy whose porn password I use finally renewed his membership. Lazy fucker had been slacking all summer.
JUST DENIED A NEW YEARS KISS BECAUSE HE WAS A COWBOYS FAN.
I just walked by a dude at the gym covering himself in olive oil.
Can you face time me. I need to know if this pill is xanex or ecstasy
I just convinced a telemarketer I live in a tree.
What did he say?
He still asked if I want a home security system.
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