Are you okay?
Don't worry. Self-respect preserved. My speech was Grey's quality... I made him cry.
Is pulling weed out of a vagina a good thing or a bad thing?
I think "bars open christmas minneapolis" is the saddest google search i've ever done.
something about eating while taking a crap just doesn't seem safe to me.
Just found out my brother beats off to Lauren Conrad. the Hills will never be the same.
I don't know what you're talking about but its dick galore in the tub. We will be getting poked tonight. Bring forks.
It's such a good feeling to send those "I'm not in jail" texts on Sunday morning
I brought some guy back to have cheese whiz with me. Then sent him home
Was he satisfied?
No, and very vocal about it.
I just yelled at a bunch of girl scouts for yelling "cookies" to loudly. That hungover
So the bump is from hitting my head in an elevator. Apparently I dived into a cab head first too.....
VAGINAS ASSEMBLE!
I'm not seeing this movie with you.
Lol, you asked the waitress to box up someone else's discarded food last night
Her shirt said pass joints, not judgement. You're surprised she stole your wallet after?
It was great. Somehow, sleeping with her sister cured everything!
He ate me out while I finished season 1 of Stranger Things. If that's not a modern day relationship goal, then I don't know what is.
Randomize
