There was a point where some of my friends attempted 'moi's', which stands for makeout on introduction.
It involved going up to women and very aggressively trying to make out with them upon meeting them
Surprisingly the success rate was exceedingly high
Even water is tasting like jack daniels
YOU CAN RENT MIDGETS ON CRAIGS LIST
I told you not to ruin your birthday surprise!
Also, just grabbed a bunch of "tuxedo black" condoms. formal, anyone?
I'd really appreciate it if we could dress up as pilgrims and indians for the thanksgiving eve bar crawl
And then I learned that we are dating when I said it's out of line to bring fuck buddies home to meet the parents. And then I was single.
he needs a life. he was like frothing at the mouth to cockblock you
I think the camel was justified in biting me.
She has an inverted nipple. She told to play with the normal one until the other one pops up.
I drink to make the karaoke go away.
I've been eating like all day, let me suffer my one 'Dear lord, I'm the size of a small whale. One that doesn't even need to find being killed by illegal whaling because I'm not even big enough to provide an decent blubber, but still big enough to be considered for a brief moment.' moment in peace.
Not even official and he's cleaned my puke twice. His hotdog skills are an added bonus. I've got a keeper
The doctor said that if they accidentally damage my nerve endings I could permanently lose feeling in my lower jaw.. Honestly the first thing that came to mind was how that would affect my blowjob skills.
Actually we have similar relationship styles aka no relationship... it could work
He had me sit on his face until I begged him to stop, then held me there 5 minutes longer. I rested my head on his chest, told him I needed time to recover....and slept for 6 hours. By the time I woke, he was already at work. I just sent him a countdown times until his shift is over.
Randomize
