We walk out of his house and his dad is there, so I had to meet him and shake his hand pretending that same hand hadn't been down his son's pants five minutes earlier
I hope you shit your pants in a socially devastating situation.
Just crossed the line with my beat friends girl twinsie. Didn't realize tillz afta how much the look alike and an thougholy creeped out. Thanks ciroc
Dude, she looked like the Canadian Slam Poet, neck hair and all.
About to find out how well alcohol and lazer tag mix.
The theme is smores and alcohol. Dress appropriately.
So you had sex with my brother?
It sounds like you dont need me to answer that.
From the prices on this menu it looks like I have no choice. I have to blow him.
Now that we both have boys can we make up games that objectify them as sex toys?
At second job interview this week. Wearing pants to hide pole dancing bruises. This my life.
I will accept it in the form of tooth necklace but if you have better ideas I am open to suggestions.
Dude that chick had a dog in her car. Like when she goes bar hoping so does roofus. He gaurds the car.
Ok well i was gonna say you can only borrow my fog machine if you will use it to emerge from your room in a cloud of smoke after having sex with sarah, so yeah we're good
Yeah, last night in the parking lot was hot. I'm sure whoever has the surveillance tapes thinks so too.
All I could think about while we were fucking was what Hogwarts house he would be in
Randomize
