Wow, t9 really hates the phrase "slap her in her sanctimonious pie-hole."
So she is eating her margarita with tortilla chips....like using her chip as a spoon
I just read the lonely terrorist on nwa had 40 more friends than me on facebook
at first i was worried but she assured me her frail vegan body would have no chance at conception.
I'm glad we are bonding over both contracting clamidya. Winners.
100%
Just successfully went through airport security with shrooms. It's gonna be a fucking awesome new years
She kept grabbing my head and told my faces to stop shaking.. Also, she kept whispering something about seeing flowers in my eyes.
Basically, what i'm trying to say is, if you don't have something, excuse or gift, to satisfy my anger i am going to look you in the eye and piss on the floor.
My whole family just stopped to look at me and aknowledge how fucked up I am.
I drank, I fought, I made my ancestors proud.
And then someone hit me with a pool cue
Fuck off I wasn't that drunk. I was still able to toss froot loops in the air and catch them in my mouth.
And in your bra. It was quite entertaining.
I don't trust a bar IN TENNESSEE that doesn't have Jack Daniels.
You threw up on his face 22 hours ago and now he's here holding your hand. I think he likes you.
I was asked last night if Magnum makes a XXL..... I don't think I've ever broken this many condoms in my life
Come over here. Bongs and porn. I found the promised land
Randomize
