So there is this guy preaching the word of God outside our club. I went up to him and said, "God made this body, and he made it for premarital sex." Sup, Hell?
Waiting outside the STD clinic 30 min before it opens already in a line up. It's like were all waiting for a concert that no ones really pumped for
look up what dreaming that you're in a lesbian relationship with a manatee means.
We left at the same time. You got home three hours after I did and said you got your head stuck in a fence. I can't believe you don't remember this.
say it with me now .. the "golden" penis. his nickname does not disappoint.
it was all good until he screamed "for fraaannnceee" on his last thrust
Im otw to class. I was at the Library. Just past three girls with a bottle of tequila playing dizzy bat.
One good thing about being a mom now, I can tell which guys I'm dating were breastfed and which weren't... By the way they latch on to my breast during sex! Kinda kills the mood.
Its not like i paid for sex. She was stuck there, we simply exchanged rides.
BGSU move in weekend. Just passed a house w a beer pong table set up, ppl already playing, girls holding signs that say "son drop off". It's 10:30 am.
He just sent me a picture of himself naked while cooking pancakes and he made the caption "bitchin' in the kitchen"
I don't trust a bar IN TENNESSEE that doesn't have Jack Daniels.
Ordered a pizza stoned. The guy handed me my pizza and I tried to pay him by handing him back the pizza.
Thank you for stroking my rage monster tonight.
Made out with sailor moon tonight. Childhood dreams do come true.
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