How was Slumdog? Did it pull your heartstrings?
It was entertaining. Better than most other Mexican films.
I just walked by a ginger with a mullet. I repeat GINGER mullet. So help us God.
Obama just said the words "we're all in this together." I wanted to start singing high school musical
He looked me straight in the eye when he was fingering me last night...it was very serial killer.
Just remembered when I bought that round of shots I told the girls to "get their whore friend" who was making out with her bf instead of drinking. I don't know why they stayed.
Dude she said she'd let me snort a line off her ass now I just have to wait for them to break up
I just walked in on my sixteen year old sister soaking her tampon in vodka. I go to Berkeley. And they think she's the good daughter.
Also, they sell weed-chocolate covered strawberries. For the romantic stoner.
That was one of the best texts I got today
it was good, but also weird. like, i came four times and then cried weird.
reason #326 why I'm still single.... my date just told me there's a little boy ghost that lives in his closet because he likes his music.
Friends don't let friends go vibrator shopping alone.
Watching a guy masturbate in real time is a lot less theatrical than porn had me to believe.
I pulled you and a keg around in a wagon for like five hours and apparently everyone else remembers it but us.
That said I did get head on the roof of a 15 story building which, regardless of quality, is still cool
in the middle of telling this chick to sober up i was shotgunning beers. im gonna be ab awsome nurse.
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