No awkward lesbian experiences without me
i told my grandma i broke up with my boyfriend. her reply " you need to play the field more anyway"
I have left a significant number of teethmarks in my prhone. My mouth tastes like tequila and cheddar. Tomorrow already feels fun.
Any time before 12:00pm. Can go fuck itself.
The girl sitting next to me in class is writing her to-do list under the title 11/31.
Contrary to what peaches says, you can't fuck the pain away. Full story later. Have a good morning, buddy.
So getting a bj to I believe I can fly is one of the greatest things ever
Like. There is beer on the other side of that door and 6 yards in. If he's not back in 20 minutes to let me in, I am using this tree as a battering ram.
Spending my graduation money on an abortion. Welcome to the real world.
I just woke up in his house on his bathroom floor with an IV in my arm.
quick, send me a pic of a fat chick eating ice cream in a bikini. no joke, no questions, just do it.
Yes, I am about to pass out on my beanbag with a mason jar of wine. Welcome to the south freshmen.
Just had to buy plan b w/ my robotic baby from family living.. Awkward.
Her son walked in on us and asked if he could "wrestle too."
Yeah well I fucked my ex on a sink last night soooo booty calls for us all
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