How many pudding cups do I have to eat for it to count as dinner?
4.
I take no responsibility of who alcohol hooks up with using my body!
Two girls are now jumping in the ocean naked at 10 PM...and I was just starting to hate Ocean City
hooked up with a girl who spoke elfish last night..what up 8th grade lord of the rings fantasies
woke up next to her writing my name in some journal. apparently she makes every guy she hooks up with sign out.
We're gonna have the chick that teaches kindergarteners to fold origami roll the joints.
he threw my burrito on the ground and said im too drunk. fuck that guy.
another part of my inner child died when i emptied my crayon bank for dollar beer night.
I used puppy pads next to the couch for her to throw up on....
From what I hear, her blowjob factory was runninng at full capacity this weekend.
He told his ice cream cone it 'looked cute' and then started to cry. The Dairy Queen people were not pleased.
I need water and some morals
Oh and people at work think i got knocked up so my gay roomie is claiming it as his lol
quit whining, rub some dirt on it, and lets get out there
its my penis
She tied me to the bed and did lines off my chest before sex. I’m going to put that on my bucket list just so I can cross it off
Randomize
