I don't usually arrange sex via text message
That's not ass to mouth..... That a rim job!! Are you telling me she licked your asshole?!
They want to listen to Lady Gaga while they puke.
I don't think you have the libido for two women at the same time
I think you underestimate the amount of time spent masturbating
I didn't think moms care packages could get better than greygoose, weed & double stuffed oreos, but she just snet me a chocolate bar full of mushrooms.
if creating a fake 8 year old brother, who lives with me and has had mono for the past month, to explain why I have ignored my group project members is wrong, then I... well then I'm probably going to hell
Whatever she smells like compost and feathers.
I believe they call that patchouli.
He rubbed my back afterwards. I forgot how to talk and I legitimately thought I was a cat for a few minutes.
Just gave candy to a strange child. Not my best move.
Don't be surprised if I hand out mini dildos on Halloween
dude...i punched my best friend in the face, broke up with my girlfriend, and shit my pants.......now i don't know which one to take care of first.
I've entered the world of uncircumcised penises. It's disgusting.
The next time we go out, we're bringing a jar so that people can contribute to the rest of what I need to come up with for my breast implants... We'll show them yours for inspiration and persuasion.
Maybe if I ever do become a counselor, I would just implement a kind of intensive meme therapy.
You took nana to a bar?!
she suggested it
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