So we went to home depot to buy supplies to build a beer bong but ended up buying an office water cooler that were going to put vodka in
"Guy Time" translaed into 10 shots apiece and me waking up covered in my own blood.
You passed out and she managed to carry you all the way back to your dorm last night. I believe your testicles now her property.
Announcement: Given the sad circumstances regarding the death of my dearest friend Chong the Bong, there will be a brief memorial service for him tomorrow evening at 10:30 at my place. After sharing some memories and sending his spirit off to the great bowl in the sky, we will all take place in the commemoration and maiden voyage of his son, Chong Squared, who eagerly waits to meet all of you. High blessings to you all, piece be with you.
If you hear a sad honk in the wind it is me.
I spent the money she owed me on enough magnum condoms to make a blimp. Damn right I'm going to make the best of it.
I just need to stick to one night stands and delete social media
Yeah bunch of crazy shit... Makes you wonder how anyone found someone before tinder
I can not believe he edited a picture of our three way and made it his profile picture
Well, let's just say, I got that eye patch like we were joking about
I told some guy on tinder, that apparently has a prosthetic leg, that I think we started off on the wrong foot. I hate myself...
excused from jury duty. THAT hungover...
I covered the puke with a shingle there's not many chunks. I think it will blend quickly.
I dont think the chain smoking, tequila shots or cocaine was good for my bronchitis.
I Never thought my late 30s would end up with me getting eaten out on a desk in the managers office of a lululemon, but I guess being a franchise owner has its perks!
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