She's holding my hand. I'm going to kill myself.
He's been dead since March and more people write on his wall than mine.
last night this guy was hitting on me by showing me the famous people he had in his contacts on his cell... when he asked me if i knew lindsay lohan, i said "whose that? sounds asian"
She tried catching cigarette ashes on her tongue like snowflakes.
I'll still trying to understand the context of your "punch her with my cock" comment.
So I am guessing last night was a success we are all accounted for and only 3 of us have hospital bracelets on
I punched some guy in the face for being an asshole then later I went to say sorry and give him a hug and he started making out with me. How was your new years?
It really went downhill when you started writing IOU on pieces of napkins. Giving them to the strippers
Real life dumb and dumber
why do you keep saying "she looks like a porn star" like thats a bad thing?
Fell asleep on kitchen floor again, chicken nuggets everywhere.
Can you tell dad to stop liking and sharing porn on FB again?
I fell asleep completely naked, standing up with my arms and head in the freezer
It's the third day of class and I got told I smell like a distillery.
I woke up in my basement holding someone else's underwear and a bottle of mouthwash . I wish I could explain more than that but i can't remember ...
I have beer and butt plugs...pretty sure I will find a way to entertain myself while I wait
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