Just took a beer bong out of snuffaluffagus's trunk. Your move
there was already a condom in her . . and it was bigger than me
I got her a Nickelback box set.
if i remember New Year's Eve then there is something seriously wrong.
Hey guess what I got for Valentine's day? Debt and blue balls.
worse. her friends hid in the bathroom while she gave me head and then screamed surprise right as i was about to cum
dude, apparently i tried to force feed my grandma bananas last night.
2 more and I will have fucked 75 percent of my acting class. best. elective. ever.
Hi Jessica this is Jessica and I am texting you and were taking lime shots and it's fantastic and I broke your elbow and I love you xo
and let me tell you something, handcuffs are surprisingly uncomfortable when they arent being used in a sexual manner
Uhm; your sign says 'Welcome to KFC' and for some reason I can't seem to open the door.
Came so hard when I was riding him that I actually bit some of his chest hair off. He said I was the first girl ever to do THAT.
You know you're too drunk when you start calling people out for unfollowing you on social networks.
I might run out into oncoming traffic. Id rather break my legs and/or die then continue with today.
Will you PLEASE get your mom to stop telling me I'd make a great husband? She knows I'm gay, right?!
I know, but she really likes you. Have you met my brother yet?
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