cruising supermarkets, asking random people where i can get weed. fuck alaska
We got so high yesterday we tried watching soccer
I think vodka calistinics prior to and during beer olympics was a bad idea
so she finally agreed to being friends with benefits. not only did I take her virginity, when I woke up, she brought me French toast made with homemade bread in bed.
I worship thee.
They found an open window, climbed through and proceeded to arrest half the party. These campus cops are like fucking ninjas.
Sitting in a bubble bath with my bong, how's your morning?
only you would end up drunk at a subway with a one-eyed homeless man
Its official. Girls from Indiana do not give rim jobs.
He could tell i had a fever by feeling my tits. He gets docter of the year.
So I'm seriously not complaining - but I just fell ass backwards into a Tuesday night threesome. Sober
mary just dropped the yahtzee dice in her wine. and shes throwin em like shes on a craps table.
hahahaha slap the bag.
Pitchers of shots should be outlawed. I've puked more than i've breathed in the past half hour.
how many thumbs am i supposed to have at one time
you found the shrooms didnt you
On a not really funny at all but kinda brighter note I've gotten really good at texting in hand cuffs
why do all the dudes in this porno look like billy ray cyrus
Randomize