sooo how much is appropriate to spend on a vibrator? what if it is really legit looking?
nothing screams I HAVE A PROBLEM! like the case of miller lite sitting on top of my DUI papers in the passenger seat of my car. lol
all we ever talk about is how much i like your dick or my drug problem.
I love how you are more concerned with what i call my penis than the fact i wanna bone some high school chicks
Replacing day drinking with a real job was the worst decision I've ever made.
was i strangled at any point last night? or was his dick just that long
I'm pregnant.
The fact that this number is not in my contacts is giving me hope it's a wrong number???
Marshall is naming all the elements of my face. I love science nerds.
We don't have any ice, so I'm using the frozen cognac to reduce the swelling on Abby's toe.
For the sake of being nice I congratulated her and she replied with something along the lines of that I need to stay away from him and not touch him ever. I really wanted to be like "been there, done that" but my New Years resolution was to not start any cat fight over boys with small dicks before noon
I was going down on her and she started whistling "Whistle while you work." I'm in love.
I had a dream I got back with Amanda. And then cheated on her the same day. Even my conscious is a dick
It’s like a buffet of marriages! Every option is available to you!
Sexy intern needs to have caveman sex with me
Is it day drinking when the suns up like when does that start
asking for a friend
Randomize
