Ben's a prick.
What Ben are you talking about?
All the bens across all the lands
You're the host. Of course you wear the diaper. It's like wearing the pants.
The movie was so bad she gave me two blowjobs. Two.
There are taser marks on me. Your face flashed before my eyes when i woke up and saw them.
Ha ha. You should see the things I'm doing to my body at Bob Evans.
There's a certain feeling that only comes from wearing pearls to hide hickeys
I know it's like I wanna bring somebody fun who I haven't drunkenly expressed my feelings for. Or hooked up with. It's a struggle.
We dated for a month and a half. he didn't like blow jobs. I honestly don't think he was human.
He said you asked to eat pepperoni off his dick and he thought it was weird
I mean I thought it sounded fun
I'm honestly wondering if my vagina did something to offend the universe
Well you know I have tits so that's half the battle
Morning fuck and a coffee. ARE YOU READY TO CONQUER THE GALAXY WITH ME??
I have dined. Now I want to get fucked.
Hypothetically speaking of course, is it bad if a cat eats lube?
I woke up this morning and my house is covered in shredded cheese with my laptop open and a google image search for "awesome shit".
Randomize
