so my mom just told me that she wouldnt pick me up and take us to taco bell at 3AM...
Her cum face looks like the large marge scene in pee-wees big adventure
so chris just stuck his hand between rachel's legs and yelled 'TROUT!' and we were like...you're wasted
Hello rock bottom. My name is Jared. Nice to meet you.
which gay bar do you need a ride home from?
She's dressed as Musafa. How could this not be a good idea?
There are no words to adequately express my gratitude for sending me porn you found staring a former classmate.
well my dad not being home definitely made it less awkward to walk in carrying the bra I left wearing.
Pitchers of shots should be outlawed. I've puked more than i've breathed in the past half hour.
We were making condiment sandwiches, then her husband kept trying to get me to sleep with her. I hate being the only lesbian at the party.
She told me she loves her boyfreind while she was giving me head. He must be a nice guy
I'm going as your incestuous sister. If thats not the perfect winglady I don't know what is.
If there's one thing I learned yesterday, it's that if I really wanted to I could be mayor of Toronto.
holy shit I just remembered that story I told about Tom hanks going bowling while high.
Do you lock your house? Serious question, I need to know if I can add it to my list of emergency poop stops
Thanks for going with me today. It’s been a long time since I bought bra and panties because of a guy
It’s called “shopping for lingerie” and it’s one of the many exciting and sexy things that follow a divorce, along with sexting, sleepovers, and orgasms
But, our next lesson is picking up a younger guys at the bar!
Randomize
