he whispered in my ear that he would be upstairs and i should come up. i stayed downstairs. he came back down and repeated to whisper in my ear. this happened about 5 times until he passed out.
Spotted: jayne dropping her cigarettes in a puddle...then picking them back up and putting them in her pocket. If i ever get that desperate, stop talking to me
It's just like soggy cereal, but cancerous
I got my half for the rent already.I called the cops on the drug dealer neighbor and got a 500 bucks as a reward
it was like weight watchers had a halloween party.
She referred to her collection of sex toys as an "arsenal." I'm not sure whether to be scared or excited....
Just looking for some anal play. An attempting to read atonement. The highbrow/lowbrow divide is striking.
She's the barista slut.
He threw up in the campfire, the alcohol in his puke caught on fire. Im marrying this man
bringing my vibrator into the shower with me. if I don't text back in 30 minutes I have electrocuted myself and died.
May the force be with you.
I don't know about this Sanders guy after all. I'm voting for MYSTERY BABYLON, WHORE OF ALL THE EARTH
Hillary?
Is it okay to mention my ambition to become a supervillian and kill all humans on a first date, or is that a second date discussion?
hey can you send me that pic of that dude?...if this isn't Rochelle's phone...can you please find and tell Rochelle to send me that picture of that dude?
WHY are you masturbating to hockey fights?
I was stuffing my face while buying a brownie and coffee and some kid I fucked came up behind me and said. Someone's hungry.
I'll be coming off of 7 days of not drinking. No horse tranqs either. I haven't been this sober since I was in the womb
Randomize
