before i could say "i'm not that kind of girl", i was.
he kept doing his monologue, "if a vagina could talk."
Taped crackers to the wall. Sat I'n the dryer. Bobby had to pull me out by my hair. No more.
I tried exercising today. I ended up masturbating to the Wii fit trainer.
I am going to be fat forever.
I think a van full of parolees just blew me kisses. Thoughts?
get ready to load up the weird cannon and blow a load of buck-wildness all over the place people
He just whispered "doors are weird" and then laughed so hard he fell down the stairs.
Yeah. It's just like I have his virginity and he has my shoes and where do we go from here.
He literally named all the parts of the vagina as he fingered me. No more pre-med virgins.
Also I would love to pregame at your place if I weren't stuck at mine drinking laxatives
Free stuff before I even put his balls in my mouth like wow great start
So it turns out strippers do encores if enough people yell. Encore song: Self Esteem.
Whatever he got a sick blow job and his high school fantasy was fulfilled
And that's what dreams are made of
*hilary duff crying in the background*
There are 6 of us in a mini cooper and his maid is in the trunk...she needed a ride.
is it weird that i just witnessed the marriage of someone ive had sex with on multiple occasions?
Randomize