Does getting a boner while watching the celtic women sing opera on ETV make me cultured?
you should be back in the room by now but just so you know. you passed out at the black jack table and they wheel chaired you out. strip club in about 45 minutes. game face bro.
She stumbled in with some guy, woke me up, introduced him and said "This is my sister. She's a freshman. She probably hates you."
Out of beer. Salsa pong. Never again.
These shoes are way too nice for a walk of shame. Its how I keep myself in line.
Went to the wedding reception, and he left with ALL of the brides maids phone numbers. I don't know how he does it either.
If I don't survive tonitght I would like to thank you for the ricekrispy treats. I am majestic
I don't want a mention or even a whisper of a Shakespeare Festival by that or any other name including, but not limited to, a fucking Renaissance Fair. Are we clear? It will be a DEALBREAKER .
"There should be some kind of award for sleeping with your ex 9 times in 3 days."
My left boob kept making random appearances last night.
I just smoked weed with my physics professor. Tell me how my life is this.
my roommate had drunk sex above me in our bunk bed and then built me a fort to apologize the next day
I'm drinking on a Thursday because I can
Today is Wednesday you jobless drunk
I still don’t believe you, the dog DID NOT tear down the shower curtain and shit on the floor.. we found you in the fetal position in the bathroom holding your tequila gun. It was you!
Well I just masturbated while reading a recipe for Alfredo sauce so I guess you could say I’m growing up
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