I'm gonna do things to you that will make the neighbors want to move.
I puked all over his apartment, then slept with the skinniest girl here. Which isn't saying much in Ohio.
And by defning the relationship I mean telling him I'm gonna fuck other people but its cool If he does the same.
Come out Saturday. It's for my lesbian daughter from the future birthday.
Sex-sore abs and my workout pants have gravel stains on the knees. It's like the workout of shame.
I greatly enjoy being related to her. Even if is it only by a penis.
Bringing families together since 1987
I think I have to break up with him. I just cried, not moaned, screamed, etc, cried, with tears of sadness and disappointment when I came.
Is it too early in the day to ask a nipple-related question?
I wore heels to a golf store in hopes of getting laid. I've hit a new all time low.
I'll have sex with you for tacos. I don't care, man.
I wonder if go pro can customize a cock ring so I don't have to hold the camera anymore
I made out with that lesbian chick for a blunt. NO REGRETS.
Etiquette question... How do you tell your mother that her nipple is out in her fb profile picture?
Come to my place after work and we can discuss our finances over a coors delight and a fire ball shot
He was so drunk last night. He woke up out of a dead sleep at 330am, walked over to the dresser, opened his middle drawer and proceeded to pee. When I woke up and asked him Wtf he was doing, he told me it was fake pee and blamed it on the cat...we don't have a cat
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