We did a shot for each one. Father... son... and holy ghost. That wasn't enough though so we moved on to toasting dead relatives.
I added "don't hook up with boys with girlfriends" to my new years resolution and realized how sad it was that it made me actually feel like a better person
triple team girl just facebook chatted me. do i tell her i had a nice time?
You may or may not of thrown up on your shoes, and you tried to give me a wet willy in my eye.
I like to get drunk just like anyone else but not to the point of sticking a rubber tube up my asshole
Whatever, I used my iphone to send an Escalade to pick up a booty call last week. For free. It is futuristic as fuck out here.
Well i think matt shit his pants so ill mark that as a W
In my dream, you became a famous tap-dancer. Congratulations.
The feeling are messing with the penis
They should incorporate dolphins into professional surfing
The night went downhill when he took his pants off at our table and walked up to women saying "Special delivery"
the quiet that you are hearing is a silent suggestion that you should go fuck yourself
a girl walked up to me and asked if you were my brother. she shook her head and said 'im so sorry' when i said yes. what did you fucking do????????
did i get sucker punched in the face last night or was our make-out session just that intense?
Remember, I smoked so you wouldn't have to. I'm like the Jesus of Marijuana.
Randomize
