i just had 3 doubles lined up on top of a urinal, texting with one hand and my dick in the other. I an fucking awesome.
we just ha sex. he lasted two minutes. i told him to leave because i had class
isnt today saturday?
normally i wouldnt have blown him but he was on dawsons creek.. i love dawsons creek.
I think i can make this amish girl legitimately hot.
seriously my hangover is so bad I feel like my eye lashes make blinking a workout
No, this is a senior booty call. It cannot be ignored.
Let's just say after this weekend I'm known as Shameous the Irish bar fighter.
Shes 18 and still has a curfew. it was great. didnt have to worry about her still being here in the morning.
We fucked like animals and then decided we actually liked each other so then we made love. It's a match made in heaven.
Apparently I really was petting a bunny named lazarus in Jimmy Johns last night.
I just threw up birthday cake.. who's birthday was it?
I was planning out a scrapbook to memorialize my affair.......and that's when it hit me, I don't make good choices. On the upside, the scrap book came out great and I am glad I saved all the gate passes from the airport.
He jerked off some dude with a slice of Wonder Bread.
The sports guy?
Yeah. They claimed the bread made it hetero
Congratulations you now have a pet Scotsman.
This is the weekend we were supposed to be in Vegas making bad decisions hoping no one got VD, not stuck at home for the 900th day in a row
Randomize
