so heres a good story. about 6 hrs ago i took a bath with bruce blasting. and 6 hrs later i woke up still in my bathtub but in cold water
so craigslist just dropped their "erotic services" ads. there goes our livelyhood
it's not our fault the pink and the sink are so close together.
You know you're wathing too much reality TV when you start adding commentary to every day life.
you were stealing lawn gnomes and punching cars. I'm not surprised you got arrested.
I just met his wife...she told me they have been having marriage problems and are spending his paychecks on marriage counseling...then she cried on my shoulder...NOW i feel like a bitch.
i'm not entirely sure that 'not getting kicked out of the bar until it got dark' really classifies as 'doing better'
My Pizza Lunchables won't fit in the fridge because of all your alcohol. One of our addictions has to give.
I'm about to do the walk of shame in a christmas onesie. What would I do without christmas sweater party season?
We are going to need a water proof camera with a flash....exit routes....lots of booze.....and a tutu for good measure
Long story short he broke into a preschool and threw all their cones into a tree.
My vagina is officially offended.
Sara can't come to the phone right now. She's currently having an in-depth conversation with a flower pot.
Its not that hard to understand he's my holiday boyfriend, we ignore each other most of the year except on holidays when I give him head
I cut him off because he was changing my thermostat every time he came over
You made the right decision
Randomize