I swear if I see one more guy in a v-neck and fedora I'm going to punch someone in the balls. This is philly, you're not supposed to look like Ryan Cabrera
Just had another dream about being on Real Chance of Love. I think it's a sign.
Worst night here by far. And ive slipped in my own piss so thats saying something
I have been way too involved with your nipples this weekend
Hows that studying goin for you?
I'm in my bathtub in a robe and jeans smoking a bowl and my hair is covered in olive oil
Nah nah nah the rules are different on st patty day, drink beer or die. It's like the hunger games but blurrier
they adjusted my tv to black and white ... i thought i drank myself to colorblindness
Apparently "I licked it so now it's mine" doesn't apply to people
I SWEAR TO GOD IF SHE FUCKS WITH OUR GOLD GENE POOL
If your gig isn't over in 30 minutes I am coming on that stage to come on your dick.
I don't know how to reply to him. 'I'm glad the ecstasy my friend tricked you into taking wore off'...? It just doesn't seem sincere
WHY IS THE HAIRSPRAY SOUNDTRACK PLAYING IN THE LIQUOR STORE
It's 9:07 in the morning and I am so hungover right now I'm about to take the kids I'm babysitting to mf'ing Popeyes bc that's all I want in this world
We were making out and truffle butter was playing in the background. I stopped mid make out session and said, "I'm really sorry but I have to rap Nicki's part."
the teacher told me he was disappointed and when I asked why he just shook his head. remember that kid that caught us having sex behind the school? pretty sure that was his son.
Randomize
