I totally got off with my controler for my ps3. Soooo glad I ended up with that racing game for Christmas.
Xanax induced break ups are the best. Since I'm a professional fiancee, I'm going to break up with them on Xanax from now on. It didn't hurt one tiiiiiny bit.
guys are only as good as the porn they watch
What do you want me to say to her? "Oh hey, I need to borrow your soon to be husband to make a porn, cool?"
I am honored my friend, to hold the decision of what enters your body
I only see on penis in this picture but I assume there is another lurking out of sight.
I just did the walk of shame..with a blanket and a cup that says i will out drink all you bitches. This was not how i pictured 25.
I don't think I can recall what a 23 year old cock felt like if one slapped me in the face.
I lost all of my bathing suit tops.. This is both a success and a failure
I got you a "sorry you think I'm pregnant" present
Beans, may the odds of a nip slip and drunken make out session be ever in your favor
he looked at me and said 'happiness is a warm blanket' then stole my vodka.
blue gatorade loses no color upon regurgitation
Don’t fucking talk to that dude from monday!! Ethical consumption dude, don’t fuck shitty guys
I know you would. And one day, we'll have a moment where i'll verbally assault a stranger for you.
Randomize
