why are there goldfish crackers all over my bed?
you decided you wanted to name them & keep them as pets.
I'm fascinated by her cleavage. She has deep cleavage, but no obvious boobage to speak of. Check it out.
this is a family affair. You're an embarrassment.
whatever it's not my family
she was like a sexier Rosie O'Donnel
well hello there hangover. fancy meeting you here on this BRIGHT thursday morning.
NEWS FLASH: A bottle of wine can fit into a taco bell cup.
Second night spent with creepy guy. I either need to change his nickname or stop doing this.
When you accidentally type "I want Prince William to fuck me in the ass" to your mom there's really no way to take that back.
some guy had a sword and everyones crying..it turned bad..fast.
First stoner thought of the day: Life would be so much better if there were more things that were biscuits and gravy flavored.
No more chicken and waffles served by drag queens at 2 AM. :(
Apparently I made a chicken patty, angrily took it out of the microwave, walked outside, and threw it over the balcony. #me
You need to get a passport so we can carry our bad decisions over the border
Ok, there are marshmallows shaped like elephants
I wanna print it out and hang it on the fridge like parents do with good report cards.
oh the joys of a picture of a negative pregnancy test
Randomize