maybe touching the ground while going 70 wasn't such a great idea after all..
dude im at a party with a bunch of 17 year old gilrs this is awesome
no its not leave
I had never watched a guy jack off to me before, but let me tell you, it was a very uncomfortable experience.
bad decision 37: pregaming the antique store
just found gum connecting my sunglasses to my floor board. you don't want to know where else it was.
shes trying to book us all flights to Ireland..I let her get mine and yours but stopped her when she tried booking the guy next to her at the library
How did a couple beers and monopoly turn into a bottle of vodka and throwing eggs at eachother in the kitchen?
You can jump from the roof to the pool. Trust me. I have done this before.
When I said tequila slammers would be the death of me, I didn't intend it to be today. Oh god.
I knew this night was headed for bad when I was drinking cherry bombs out of a sippy cup in the shower
Dude, please tell me you know why there's a naked chick asleep outside my room.
We cuddled after till the morning. Then he woke up sober... and straight.
He ate me out while watching Fifty Shades of Grey---needless to say I'm locking this down
my favorite part of this morning was sitting at the gynecologist smelling like cigarettes and wearing yesterday's clothes.
A girl in McDonalds just asked if I was in here wasted a few nights ago throwing fries at the staff, I said it was my twin
We both know that wasn't me
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