Yes because finding a guy to give head to is pretty difficult.
I mean not really
Obviously that's why it was a joke you are so stupid it's impossible.
today is my dealer's birthday. i dont know whether to give him the day off or call him saying happy birthday ill take a quarter please
took 4 advil with a shot of vodka, figure i'd try to save myself now
do you remember the combo for the lock to my pants?
I'm just pissed at the whore who takes over my body when I'm blacked out.
Every part of me is in agreement...but mostly my vagina
The best part of last night was the women's softball game on the TV at the strip club
I wasn't vocally whispering "she wants to bite your dick off" about that kirsten girl was I?
Fair enough. Everyone has some guilty pleasures. Yours is yourself
Best sex of my life. But I think it's because I like his apartment. Really nice bed sheets. High vaulted ceilings. I wanted to lay there forever.
You're getting old. Was it located in a nice school district for your future offspring?
There's no discreet way to sneak a cucumber into the shower lol
She made me undress her with my teeth...explains the button in my shit this morning...
Just so you know, you called at 2 last night and kept making me tell you that I loved you and then when you got home you thanked me for walking you home. Incase you forgot, I'm still about 200 miles away.
Hey I had a great night last night but I don't want to lie to you I'm only 19 and that wasn't my place its was my cousin he's gone for the summer and I was just house sitting and watching his cat I'm sorry
They tried to get you to drink water and all you kept shouting was, "NO MORE LIQUIDS OF *ANY* KIND."
Randomize
