okay serious question, the water is shut off in your house, do you attempt and use the clean toilet water for your new bong?
i wiped a booger on my final. end of semester present.
I had 4 margarita's and 2 mixed drinks and i blew zero's. Its a cinco de mayo miracle.
You tried to pay the bartender in graduation checks, I think you'll be fine in the real world.
she is medically diagnosed as a nympho. she has the paper to prove it. hell. fucking. yeah.
Well I put her head right through the headboard. Thank god the room was under her name.
She tags her boyfriend in all of her pictures on her heart...
Before I left he asked me if I could submit my panties for the frat house undergarment chandelier. I said yes
Wow. This hand sanitizer smells awesome. It's like I just gave a handjob to a fruit basket.
Trust me I was high for like 5 years...I got this
Yehhhaaww I'm way ahead of you. I'm gunna get her a card that says " I'm sorry your now ex boyfriend decided to upgrade"
You don't know how skeptical I was about letting a guy with braces go down on me
what's your room number? I've never been there sober...
Last thing I remember I was riding on a picnic table being hauled around by a lawn mower with an empty case of bud light on my head...
I'm declaring this weekend Captain Morgan weekend
You declare every weekend Captain Morgan weekend...
You just don't understand... :'(
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