I look better un-naked...
the russians are downstairs with the vodka loudly proclaiming happy birthday america. i don't care if it's the fourth, i care that it's 9 am and they woke me up.
I feel like we should actually go to church one of these days to thank god for saving us from herpes and babies.
Its completely acceptable to go naked under my graduation gown right?
Some ppl might frown upon it but theyre prudes
I WANT TO. I JUST IMAGINE HIS BEAUTIFUL BLONDE HEAD INBETWEEN MY LEGS AND I BREAK DOWN AND START CRYING.
Megan brought her friend up last night, greeted her by drunkedly taking a piss all over her duffle bag of clothing
Pagan metal show. There is a folk dance happening in the mosh pit. Also, I have no idea where we are.
If you can't seal the deal with her, I will. And you know I'll be successful. So there's your incentive
I'm almost too old to be on The Real World but feel like I'm too young to be on The Bachelor and I'm just really confused with my place in life.
10/10 would definitely still fuck you dressed as squirrel
He's gonna be like you slept with too many of my friends and you're being voted off the island haha
When you trip so hard that you can see your friends thoughts through their pupils.
This is the fifth time tonight that girl has taken off my pants. Take me home. Now.
Just calm down. My foot long super joint and I will be over shortly.
It's to the point where if a guy can so much as find my clit, I'll consider him amazing in bed
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