U r making out with a 12 year old get ur shit together
We had to be out of the dorms at 730. Meeting started at 8. I woke up at 948. Drunk and covered in glitter.
The is a pregnant woman in this Chipolte wearing a shirt that simply says ‘OOPS!’ across the tummy.
That baby is bound to be under-loved.
on a side note you can NOT make bong water out of a pear
It's 10am. I'm hungover wearing a flyers jersey and a phillies hat and eating a cheesesteak. I'm not the only one. Best city ever.
dudes here are drinking wine, and not in the forgivable 'just doing this to get laid' way
then you gave the doctors and nurses bloody high fives
we had to stop you from eating moldy cake.. twice.
So I paid for the taxi using pennies and hair clips, no need to thank me.
Is it rude if I don't go?
No. It is not rude if you don't go to her cat's Star Wars themed birthday party.
Sometimes you just gotta fuck a has been local celebrity for your 15 minutes.
dude, my hangover is telling me there was tequila involved
CRAIGSLIST IS NOT THE ANSWER
IM LONELY AND HORNY
Do you think if I had a tempurpedic bed he would still be able to feel me fingering myself after we have sex?
OMG OMG OMG Ive hit the penis jackpot
It seriously took everything in my power not to sleep with him
What did it come out and serenade you? Lol
It sang to me in the dark. It was magical
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