The money shot is kinda like the "The End" part of a children's book isn't it?
i actually just woke up with a lampshade on my head. god damn cliches.
We hadn't had sex in so long that I started queefing and then I couldn't stop giggling... I think he's mad.
So Ryan had to wash the dishes. His solution: take a shower with them. I'm never eating at his house again.
so when he was about to cum, he screamed his mother's name and continued to pray for forgiveness. wtf
And by sexy pictures I mean pictures of my penis in strange places. I rock out with my cock out.
Is it wrong I want to seduce my ex to prove the point to his current gf he's an ass?
Why is my vagina being sacrificed for yours? I'm sure he would take a piece of you too. Your turn.
I want a bottle of whiskey to be dropped at my doorstep like a stork drops babies when they are delivered to their parents.
God what have you done to be that much in need of alcohol.
Me WANTS my preciousssssssssss
I'm a college student and my dad gets more ass than I do..... do you see a problem here?
We found him. He was passed out in a McDonalds booth with at least 6 big Mac wrappers. The employee said he kept yelling that he was in America and had the freedom to have big macs. Fucking Italians...
Chipotle farts are not good for seducing boys.
MY MOM WALKED IN WHILE I WAS EATING THEM OUT AND STARTED ASKING US ABOUT THE PROJECT RUNWAY EPISODE WE WERE WATCHING EARLIER
Hey do you remember me?
You were the giant banana I had sex with... how could i forget?
She can't take shots?!? Literally if I could list that as a skill on a resume I would
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