How young is too young to ask my kid to make me a drink?
Thank you for leaving pool of vagina on my girlfriends carpet.
The best time of year to be high is WHEN THE KING CAKES ARE HALF OFF BECAUSE MARDI GRAS IS OVER YEEEEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHH
Dude, I just cut my asshole on the new toilet paper. If you rationed the grocery money to buy drugs, I better be getting some.
its mom's weekend..did we need to couger proof the apt?
we were sitting in the bathtub when she came in with her grandpas cane adn beat us until lindsay passed out
My arms are sore from holding up pukeahontas for so long
I am stoned and listening to the Olympics music I downloaded on Saturday. Best 6 dollars I have ever spent.
how many people can say they bit their tattoo off?
Went outside and he was playing rock paper scissors with a cop over a drunk in public ticket.
All of the hungover. I've changed not showered but can't quite make it to the booze.
WE'RE IN THE RED ZONE PLAY THRU THE PAIN
See, I'm just thinking of how...angular my room is. You probably would have sustained brain damage
I only drink at bars with bathrooms big enough to have sex in.
At least you didn't lose your virginity to chumbawumba
I was just told that I'm the Sherlock Holmes of drunken sex. I'll take it.
Randomize