P.S. theres no milk for breakfast, but theres plenty of beer or red wine. you decide.
i'm lost and i look like a hooker
Come 10 years my vagina won't look like this. I must cherish it
So, we're going at it on the sink when a German kid walks in and starts brushing his teeth. I love hostel sex.
I've never had a better reason to do blow of a Pittsburgh strippers ass than to try and keep pace with my dad.
You mean the girl who was passed out face down on the bathroom floor until 10 AM? You're right, she was cute.
do you know how hard it is to walk a mile drunk on 151 it's hard yards are soft and every girl looks good
"guaranteed dick" "anywhere - her room, my room, trees, couch"
Sorry that was quotes about you from the grad student.
I'm drinking wine from the cap of my laundry detergent container, wearing my bed sheet as a cape. How do you think I'm taking it?
Yeah, but he has adorable dimples and dimples talk me into things.
I hope you get your threesome on vday. I'll probably get flowers and a candlelit dinner. trade you. I wish this guy was more of a slut and had less of a heart. I would like 2 dicks please fuck your flowers!
But now he's gone and I'm exhausted and my vagina is yelling at me and I want a cheeseburger
My apartment is also really close to an alcohol rehab in case I get out of hand
Okay, new plan. Get drunk, eat breadsticks. It's going to be great.
The closest thing I've had to an orgasm lately is sneezing nonstop from fucking allergies.
Randomize
