would you object to me following you around all the time with a video camera and selling it to TV? Your life could make me millions.
This may sound mean but have u ever just sat in class and look at some of the the people and think how disappointed their parents must be
Awww, you two will make beautiful abortions together...
update. expensive tequila only makes the mistakes more expensive.
Look what our sorority has done to us...we're hitting on girls in hopes of getting an awesome little.
just tried googling 24 hr taco bell and when i typed "24 hour" it autocompleted with fitness. buzzzz killllll
She was stumbling around looking for her cat. She said i could help, but i had to call him by his jungle name
you stumbled up the stairs in your heels, pulled 23 one-dollar bills out of your bra and then went and puked in the toilet. didnt say a single thing to me the whole time
I swear I can't go out anymore. It's like he put a GPS in my dick. I don't know if I should feel awkward or proud...
So wait. Let me get this straight lol... you... are are considering offering fetish services to "trample and own" someone for $80 in order to pay for someone to come organize ur shit? Pure genius.
YOU CANT FOOL THE TOILET
You having your own car has severely reduced the amount of blowjobs I get.
She's got Mike in the bathroom. He's covered in meat.
Reminding you of hookups your brain is trying to suppress. That's what friends are fooooooooor...
Harry Potter pub crawl tonight. You know you're living your life right when your check list for the evening is wizard robes, wand and acid.
Randomize
