It was so good the neighbors even had a cigarette.
Dude. The walls are totally staring at me right now. I told you this was a bad idea.
If our dicks could shake hands in congratulations they would
I've never seen a kid turn down a sure thing for a possible handy by a freshmen. You need to re-evaluate.
Good morning! Spongebob is on channel 257 when you wake up. Help yourself to breakfast. You were great last night. See you when i get back.
Seius question. Does a penis floar when ina baht? Must find out.
I am too drunk to be out in this weather around all these animals.
i accidenteley seduced the christian girl's brother so i dont think we can count on free church picnic food again
Why are your underwear on my dining room table?
It's Christmas, you should know what a virgin is.
So yeah, turns out I enjoy vaguely public group sex. Who knew?
YOU BETTER TOUCH MY NIPPLES TODAY
Well he offered to lick my asshole so...I'm not really worried about his interest level.
Well, I can now cross "dirty drunk homeless hobo" off of my bucket list of people who have been successful wingmen for me. North Carolina is getting weird.
You know when your cat drags a dead bird into the the house as a present and drops it at your feet looking all pleased because it thinks you'll be pleased? That's what sex with him was like.
Randomize
