what if every blade of grass was a penis?
I'm pretty sure I'm almost gay. Like, I'd do it if I had no choice. Like, if i were in prison I'd try it.
Haha im sorry. Its just financially responsiable to bang him instead of you right now.
The movie was so bad she gave me two blowjobs. Two.
You think posting ushers "let it burn" video on his fb page is in bad taste? haha
Last comment. I know of no exercises, diets or practices out there to help keeping balls young and healthy. They simply succumb to gravity.
Everyone was passed out so I turned off the lights and locked all the doors. I also took the chicken sandwich in the microwave as payment.
he made a bon jovi sex playlist and started crying when "i'll be there" came on... how was your night?
Is it bad form to spend company money and place an ad in the paper because I wanna nail the sales girl?
Having sex with him is like eating mayo. Don't think about it, just do it. It's worth it.
HOW DID I LET MYSELF GET SUCKED IN HE HAS A PENIS FOR PETE'S SAKE.
Happy 4 year arrest-aversary! I promise no thanksgiving has been as eventful as that one haha..
Dude, you ever snap awake on the toilet at work with that panicked, "How long have I been here?!" feeling??
No he doesn’t answer my texts except for like on New Year’s Because like I was fucked up on New Year’s and he said happy new year and I told him the same and I called him dragonslayer and you can’t really recover from that
Well the cops were called after the kid fell, but we saw 4 cute guys from our window while it was going down, so it wasn't all that bad.
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