Did you know nanny-cams work just as well for recording that blow job on the sofa?
sitting in class between the roommates of the two girls i fucked over break. this feels like a bad version of wife swap
Im still in bed and cant move and i only had Two beers and a shot last night... how did I make it in college?
God gave us a 4 year grace period.
She bent the beer can with her tongue. I'm scared of what she'll do to me
I'm not sure if you saw my recent facebook update, but I have already put the Radio Flyer wagon to good use. I had someone pull me to the nearest bar.
Definitely want to eloquently cunt punt those bitches thru the field goals of life.
I'm going to empty my bank account and roll around in the cash. Want to join?
You did profess your love for cotton multiple times and your hatred for all other fabrics
Passing out on a toilet is not classy no matter what you're wearing. Not even a pea coat.
Paris has not been good for her. Everytime she has a one night stand from a different country, she buys a mini flag and tapes it to her wall with the others
So here's a brief summary of my weekend: last night I drank four glasses of Death Punch, grabbed the toaster, said "This is mine", put it in my pants and walked out the front door.
Man I can't wait till Thursday if strippers and beer are what you consider "research"
Well you know I have tits so that's half the battle
I can't wait to shower all this regret off of me
For someone who's supposed to be gay Greg is really good at seducing me into things I don't wanna do
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