But regardless, you really stood out last night, you should give me a chance
Sorry but you seem like a potential womanizer
school has made you so classy.
that's mcgill. producing sluts since 1884.
She ordered a salad and a budweiser. I love her.
He looks like the kind of guy that would jack off to weird things.
Because it is about to snow, I sent him for Diet Coke and cigarettes. It's the gay version of milk and bread.
i think he was starting go for a boob grab when we both realized the middle of a public tennis court wasn't the place
This has been your unwelcomed wake-up call, brought to you by exes united. Have a good day, to opt out please type "STOP", to continue but act as though they do not exist please enter "DON'T CARE" for random daily wake up texts by exes united please press "PSYCHO!"
I'll probably regret it tomorrow. But right now, accepting this $2000 credit card so that I can finance booty calls from across the united states sounds like a golden idea.
made the entire pub sing the british national anthem, puked, rallied, then peed in a telephone booth and have pictures to prove it, taking tourism to another level since 2012.
Traded my phone for pizza, then got it back this morning....successful night
Walked in the bathroom at work and my boss was taking a shit with the stall wide open and responded "oh yeah, I forgot you never have been to prison "
I never thought wine and chicken nuggets would end up being a thing that I did, but here we are
I told my boyfriend that the thing I missed most about him was scratching his balls for him.
I'm wandering around outside asking things if they are god
It does not feel like it was just this morning that I had a penis in multiple cavities of my body
Randomize
