question: from what angle do you give a hand job. im confused..
i just taught a 3 year ld how to do a jager bomb, i cant wait to have kids
I woke up face first on my living room floor arms outstretched toward the christmas tree
Because ur a stupid bitch
Actually, I'm graduating from college on Saturday so that makes me a well educated bitch.
tell me how i ended up in the movie theater alone with a bottle of smirnoff and a bendy straw.
The djing cat is back again. I think he just makes appearances when im shit drunk just to fuck with my mind.
This guy just tried to hit on me on facebook. His most recent listed education is middle school. This is my life.
when the song champagne showers came on you poured some kids beer over his head... while giving him a lap dance
I could study for finals and ace all my tests but wheres the fun in that? id rather black out and hope for the best
When a bartender remarks "wow" on how quickly you've finished a drink... Is that good or bad?
Don't worry, I could have been accepted their by waving my dick at the admissions building.
He offered me a trade. He'll come sober to my parents 25th anniversary dinner if I let him tie me up for an hour.
Update. bondage is a lot harder than it looks.
Have you ever had chicken nuggets while high? Because it tastes like hearing the Beatles for the first time
I was orgasming and dying of laughter at the same time. I think I've found the One.
No it was fine, I've just never seen that many people eat dog food
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