did it hurt when the cum got in your eye
not so much hurt, more like a stinging sinsation like mouthwash
whatever. i fb stalked him and his pic comments are witty. so i'm going for it.
Nothing says Happy Thanksgiving like having to pee in a condom for my cousin so that he can pass a drug test.
You bet me 100 dollars that the Raiders would win the super bowl this year. I have it on tape.
Whatever. I indirectly made you cum overseas. Call it even.
There's gotta be a happy medium between the guys who only want to sleep with me and the ones that respect me too much to try to sleep with me.
I just sprawled out on my bedroom floor and cried while shoveling chocolate into my mouth.. I should not have Bacardi at home
I think ur a lot drunker then u think u are. That girl has the body of a cartoon character and not in a good way.
If I die young bury me in satin. And make sure there's a taco bar at my funeral.
You were sending me snapchats from a bathtub with your beer helmet on and your boobs out.
I want to share a beverage of the alcoholic category with you, but I'm conflicted about getting out from under my covers.
Dude, I have everything I need for meth here.
YOU ARE NOT ALLOWED TO MAKE METH IN OUR APARTMENT.
THE SUN DOESNT SET TIL 647 YAAAAASSSSSSSSSS. Goodbye seasonal depression hello regular depression
I was just told that I'm the Sherlock Holmes of drunken sex. I'll take it.
And to be clear I have only watched porn like 3 times at work
Randomize
