i had a dream the other night i was titty fucking you while you were asleep, then you woke up and didn't care.
so they made cookies with their faces printed on them...I ate jaime...she tasted like poop
but the lizard people decide everything anyway
well..after leaving the bar you handed me your wallet and said you didnt need it cause you were going to find the cash cab and added 'i'll see you on tv'
She can't drink and she can't smoke weed. She might as well be dead to me.
high in an attic. pig roast in 10.
No I'm not coming over. That Bob Ross drinking game is too intense.
While you were in the ER we decided to tailgate in the parking lot until security told us that's not allowed.
Speaking is such a hard concept right now
i understand you have values and thats awesome, all i want to help you do is forget about them breifly
You kept whispering "Party Dave" every time someone would start talking.
He said he cried as he watched porn yesterday; I'd say he's taking the break-up pretty bad....
What did you two do last night and why did Sam send me a picture of your dick?
If I remember correctly I tried to steal a mail truck last night
and then I partied with my new dealers deaf pit bull. All around a good night I'd say...
how don't worse things happen to you?
Randomize
