I got date raped at Sigma Chi last night!
Dude, you never made it to Chi last night. You fell into a tree and passed out.
Pretty sure that this text will cost me like $5 but just wanted you to know that I just smoked a bowl of kush, about to walk around shopping for hookers and i get 3 credit hours for this study abroad .... have fun studying for finals.
she kept peeing on everything and yelling it was now her property.
I'm going to pre plan my black out tonight. I think I'll set a change of clothes out on my bed and unplug the oven.
of course not. I do my best teaching on a hungover monday. I did the research. im still okay with the direction in which my life is headed.
He walked into the bar right as I was licking the shotglass clean. We made eye contact for way too long..
I got home and laid by the toilet and then alexa laid in the bathtub and sang the preamble while kayla held my hair
it's graduation. he's gonna get congratulations slash emotional i cant believe youre leaving me sex.
Youre the drunk baby that everyone wants to take care of.
Is it bad that I don't ask for names anymore? Just added "gold-chain-wearing hotel guy" to my list under "minivan 3way" and "funny-tasting gym guy."
The point remains that this is the setup for some great stories
Or terrible, horrifying, traumatic experiences
great clearly means different things to us
True freedom is running around a sex club in former power plant in Berlin wearing a boots, a jock
WE HAVE TO LEAVE. I HAVE HAD SEX WITH WAY TOO MANY PEOPLE IN THIS BUS STATION.
Could be all of this cough syrup, but I’m ready to fuck 2018 up!
I just threw up in the bushes and my gardener started clapping...
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