Taking a 35 year old indonesian home, only in vegas ;-)
i soberly give you permission to do that to me when im drunk
No, we just ended up walking around in his pool high and singing songs by The Wiggles.
New all-time record for most uncomfortable I've ever been. A midget just asked me to restrap his fanny pack in the bathroom.
Now that I'm 21, I feel like I'm letting North Dakota down by not being drunk everyday
I am highly attracted to the men and that's all i can say. I do not clap and make noises but i do turn to the side and say how i'd do incredible things to them if given the chance
My dermatologist just asked me, "what happened here?" referring to the bruising on my nipples. I told her I walked into a door. Thanks for that awkward moment.
then out of nowhere we heard a voice yell "Fuck that pussy!"
WTF WHY ARE YOU STILL NOT DOING A BEER BONG?! THE TOILET CLOG CAN WAIT
We couldn't get our shit together to go to the bar, so we're getting drunk and facebook stalking all the girls who have gotten fat since high school. Any names you wanna throw out?
The strip club called, they have your shoe.
Hey did where's my bong?
In the tree out back .... Top branch on the right
Should I bother to ask?
He was humming "here comes Peter cottontail" while unbuttoning his pants. Happy Easter to me
Remind me to tell you the story of the fuzzy condom
whose shirt was i wearing?
his little sister's
what was she wearing
a feather boa and 6 inch heels
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