yes we were fucking thats why i put "watching a movie" in quotations
i used baking grease as lip gloss
I woke up face down on my laptop with three windows open: itunes, chat roulette and redtube
apparently i was cut off before i even walked in
Its great. Every time she starts barking i know ive got approximately 37 seconds to hide my gf in the closet and throw some clothes on
New favorite drinking game: bobbing for jello shots. Where did these freshmen come from and when can we go there?
They should really start adding the average cost of day drinking to our cost analysis sheets. Does FAFSA cover this? No. It doesn't.
Can't you just imagine you've grudge fucked me so we can get past this?
Hey, I'm off work. Wanna take a metric fuckton of adderall, possibly get daydrunk, and get my hair cut?
It'd probably just be a lot of profanity and hyperventilation and deteriorating into tears anyways
so just a regular conversation then
I found a video on my phone from last night... You got up on the table at McDonald's and screamed BURRITOOO!
Sorry about my life...
I can't believe I got dumped for a fat chick, but at least I got four and a half years worth of free shit. So we can call it even.
Just puked. First it was bright neon blue then it turned to bright lime green. How does that even happen? And wtf was I drinkin last night?
ALL I WANT IN MY MOUTH IS A GLORIOUS COCK SMOTHERED IN CHOCOLATE. DICK AND CHOCOLATE; IS IT TOO MUCH FOR A GIRL TO ASK FOR?!
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