Regardless thnx for trying to help out, I realize we are dealing w/ very stupid girls here
A joint and a Nerds Rope = breakfast of champions for the unemployed
I wanna fuck padma even more now that she's preggers. Is that sick?
Yes but- 100% agreed
just gave a yankee's fan wrong directions to Fenway....welcome to boston asshole
Took an impromptu nap on the floor of a starbucks bathroom using my backpack as a pillow. Please tell me you have been this hungover
there's a guy pushing a keg up the street in a shopping cart. you have to love graduation
I was barred out and drunk as fuck locked out at 3am in my Indian costume. It was literally freezing outside. I laid down on the concrete and made a bonfire with dry leaves. Then proceeded to ask.the.bonfire nicely to "please dont go out". Drunk me went strait up survival mode.
wine lets you be on time to class apparently
This is a dangerous realization
He played the same pre-sex songs as his brother...
WHY DIDN'T YOU INVITE ME TO RUN THROUGH TACO BELL'S SPRINKLERS AT 4AM?!
My mouth taste like pussy and my dad noticed. Hahahaha
Do you have any puffy paint? I want to put "fiesta muthafuckas" on my sombrero but its too much to bedazzle.
you take my contact solution?
drank it last night then filled it with brandy for the plane ride.
No way hahaha I have zero intention of adding him I wanna just join in on a three some but mostly just be there for moral support and snacks
I can count on one hand the number of good things that happened over the past year.
Randomize
