this is amy. the small petlike person from the womens bathroom at the reef.
I just met the 30 percent of the population with an STD
He confessed to putting dry erase marker dots on my vibrator to keep track of when I "electronically cheated" and then passed out.
u got into a flexing contest with a dude in bathroom in the mirror at the club
his apartment was in a funeral home, walk of shamed through a visiation in the skankiest outfit i own
Remind me never to take that much Vicodin ever again. I laid in bed measuring my heart rate for an hour and a half because I was afraid it would stop.
I was to the point where my socks were drenched in ranch dressing
I'm pretty sure the bus driver knew how hung over I was and hit all the pot holes on purpose. I threw up into my water bottle.
I just found a video of you asking to be a whale with me.
Guy just came in wearing only shorts, on his hand was written - my name is ... Call ... And tell them where i am, thanx - in permanent marker, ordered his favorite dish, and left w/out touching it. It's snowing outside.
Only Tommy would bring a stripper pole to a bonfire
Yup on the verge of buzzed and drunk. I managed to make my way into my cat's box house to fall asleep. I'm comfortable
So I'm pretty sure I told every one at the party that "I'm going to fuck my pillow pets tonight?"
No alcohol sales on Election Day. WTF? Today, of all days, I need to be splurged to to vote for any of these morons running for president.
There are regrets.. and there are RAGRETS
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