I'm surrounded by dudes and fupa's! No hot chicks...wtf!?
Medical industry, most hot chicks dont want to deal with blood + shit
What the hell do I have to do to get some foreplay around here? This sucks.
I think you know the answer.
How can I marinade myself in Vodka?
i just farted in the library and heard some girl yell it was sulfur gas. can. not. move.
I want to make a porn site called "girls with daddy issues"
I just noticed that when I sneeze...my nipples get hard.
No joke. Last we saw of him he was naked and dragging that stupid goat into the bushes.
seeing two hook-ups in tagged in the same picture will send chills down anyone's spine.
The bartender from Thursday remembered me... And gave me a FLAMING BUCKET of alcohol.
oh no, don't get me wrong.. she IS really pretty. If you are in to horses or Sarah Jessica Parker.
MANGO MOTHERFUCKING GODDAMN MARGARITA DELICIOUSNESS
You made her yell her own name while you were fucking so that you would remember it in the morning.
She said you told her you were ready to be a dad. We just got back from our purchase of the morning after pill. That took me 2 hours of convincing. No more fucking my sister.
1. Thanks. 2. No.
Is it possible to be drunk burnt? Like sun burnt but from drinking? Cus I think I that's what it feels like
I spent all the money my grandpa gave me for Christmas last night….solid start to 2015
Oh no...did you put star fish over your nipples again?
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